Obsessive Chihuahua Disorder

I wrote this squidoo lens on Obsessive Chihuahua Disorder. Like my lenses on Dating Space Aliens or Retrosexual Women, it is meant to be funny. I can never decide if people "get it," although they seem to be. Anyway, I think it is a pretty amusing read if you want to stop by.

I am still trying to crack the code of what lenses actually sell something. My sales have now skyrocketed to a whole $2.34, plus I made $3.38 for just having some well ranked lenses. OK, well, sort of well ranked lenses. I can see the blank looks on the faces of my loved ones as they ask, "For this you missed The Office?"

So I have no life. Got it.

Anyway, like the meager amount I'm making currently at Cafepress and Zazzle, I am not really doing well. I suppose if I were selling some product that would remove the hair from the palms of teenaged boys, I'd be in.

Say, do you know of an affiliate program for that?

A Passing

It is with deep sorrow that I announce the passing of my father. I did manage to get to North Carolina a few hours before he died, which was a blessing. I may be on and off with my posting for a bit; I appreciate eveyone's prayers.

Cafepress vs Printfection vs Zazzle Part 3

This is my third article comparing the relative success I am having with these three Print on Demand companies. If you would like to read the others first, they are:
Cafepress vs Printfection vs Zazzle
Cafepress vs Printfection vs Zazzle Part 2

Today being January 1, I'd like to look back at my December sales with each store to see how they performed.

At Cafepress I have 4 premium stores: ottoblotto, Soup to Nuts, The Happy Nest Site, and Biblical T Shirts. My 13 year old daughter also has a store: Bird Geek.

Here are my results by store. In ottoblotto I sold items from the following designs:
Obsessive Chihuahua Disorder
Pool Boy
It's My Mother's Fault
Obsessive Catfish Disorder
Unsocialized Homeschoolers Bumper Sticker
I Love My Bouvier des Flandres
Token Straight Friend
My Heart is in Forks
I Love My Irish Wolfhound
Ask Me About My Pink Slip
I Love My Alpine Goats

In Soup to Nuts I sold items from the following designs: I Love My Nigerian Dwarf Goats
I Love My Brussels Griffon

In The Happy Nest Site I sold items from the following designs:
My Quaker Parrot Ate My Homework
My Chickens Ate My Homework
Obsessive Cockatiel Disorder
Toucans Rule
Macaws Rule

In Biblical T Shirts I sold items from the following designs:
1 John 14:6
Proverbs 27:17
Psalm 139:14
Groovy Christian Chick
John 3:16 Albanian
John 3:16 Maori
John 3:16 Portuguese

In Bird Geek my daughter sold items from the following designs:
I Smell Popcorn [I wish she'd sold more]

Several designs sold multiple items. I sold 9 items from the Obsessive Chihuahua Disorder design. It was certainly the best month I've ever had, but is it enough to call a living? Hardly. All that represents an income of $217.76 [at premium price level] less the monthly shop fees for 5 shops.

I have 3 shops with Zazzle: Live Simply, Biblical T Shirts, and ottoblotto. December saw my first sales at Zazzle. Here's how Zazzle shakes down.
In Live Simply I sold items from the following designs:
Obsessive Coonhound Disorder
Obsessive Cockatiel Disorder

In Biblical T Shirts I sold items from the following designs:
John 3:16 Swedish
John 3:16 Haitian Creole
John 3:16 Slovak

In ottoblotto I made no sales.

That gives me a combined earning from Zazzle of $13.13. Wow.

I have 3 shops with Printfection: ottoblotto, Biblical T Shirts, and Birds of Paradise.
I have yet to make a sale with Printfection.

One thing you might notice about all the designs that sold: they contain no art. They are just words. I have had a huge number of my Library People on Cafepress along with other art. It just doesn't sell. So if you are looking to make money, you might take these results into consideration.

You might also see that pets, be it birds or dogs or chickens or goats, are likely your biggest sellers.

Another thing I've found is that with my Biblical designs, it is mostly the non-English designs that sell. Also, Christmas being a Christian holiday, one might think there would be more sales of Christian designs, but apparently not.

I use a variety of ways to advertise my stores including my email signature, blogs, articles, and telling everyone I know. Still, not one single sale this month came from any of those efforts, despite numerous people telling me they would be shopping this Christmas in my shops. All my sales came directly from the marketplace. Another thing to take into account.

I hope these articles are helpful to you if you are currently working in POD, or thinking of getting started with a POD company. If you have experience here that can be helpful to us, please comment.

Cafepress vs Printfection vs Zazzle Part 2

OK, for those of you who are in POD, or are considering getting started in POD, this is another in a series of random observations regarding the online POD opportunities.

November is over. We find out today that we are in an official recession, and have been for a whole year now. Duh. I certainly didn't need a committee to tell me that. However, November's sales were somehow promising, if only temporarily. Here's how it racks up.

On Cafepress, I made sales of items in the following designs:
Psalm 139:14
Don't Make Me Break Out in Tourette's
John 3:16 Czech
Guitar Boy
Unsocialized Homeschool Children on Board
I Love My Norwegian Elkhound
I Love My Flock
We are Unsocialized
Obsessive Cockatiel Disorder
Obsessive Catfish Disorder
I Love My Toy Manchester Terrier
I Love My Nubian Goats
Tasmanian Devil in Tutu
John 3:16 Hungarian
I Love My Alpine Goats
Obsessive Chihuahua Disorder

OK, that's not great, but considerably better than any month in recent memory.

On Zazzle, I made sales of items in the following designs:
None. No sales.

And on Printfection?
Zero. Nada. Zip.

Interesting. I checked what was going on between the three websites over on Google Trends. Here is the result.

The blue line represents search volume for Cafepress, and the yellow line represents Zazzle. Printfection's numbers are so small, they don't even make it to the chart.

Of course, you could make the case that since I have more designs on Cafepress, that accounts for much of the discrepancy. However, I don't have that many more designs on Cafepress, and Zazzle and Printfection offer a number of items not available on Cafepress.

All of this suggests that, although galleries are free on Zazzle and Printfection, you may get exactly what you pay for. We'll see how December stacks up.

See Cafepress vs Printfection vs Zazzle
See Cafepress vs Printfection vs Zazzle Part 3

St Joseph Will Help Sell Your House

I am trying to sell my house so I can get out of Arizona. Could I have picked a worse time to do so? I doubt it.

My real estate agent is of the opinion that I have about as good a chance of being hit by lightning as selling my house. I can't decide if I appreciate his candor or not.

Some friends advised me that the thing I needed to do was to bury a statue of St. Joseph upside down in the front yard, and a sale would surely be forthcoming. Being as how I'm not Catholic, this was news to me, so I looked it up online, which is pretty much how I start anything these days.

St. Joseph refers to Joseph, the adoptive father of Jesus. If you will remember, he had a lot of housing issues. There was no room in the inn, so they took up residence in a stable. Then, they fled to Egypt, then they returned, but this time to blend into the quiet of Nazareth. So if you think about it, he should be plenty sympathetic to people with housing issues.

I researched online, and found that most authorities on this subject say that you should bury your statue of Joseph upside down in the front yard, with him facing your house, and in close proximity to the For Sale sign. If he faces the street, then the house across the street may sell instead of yours. However, if you have neighbors you don't like, you might try burying a statue of St. Joseph upside down pointing toward their house, so that maybe St. Joseph will get them packing instead.

Needless to say, I now have his statue buried in my yard, accompanied by many prayers. Now what I need is a good thunderstorm.

The drawing is Library People #116. 

Illustration Friday: Pretend

I am back to drawing Library People. This is #112 in the series. It is a graphite drawing on the inside of a discarded library book. Since my husband is between jobs, like so many other Americans, it seemed like a good time to go back to these, as they usually sell. I'm not going to pretend this will get us through the current hard economical times, but we'll all do what we can.

We are trying to sell our house here in Phoenix so we can move back to North Carolina, buy a farm, and do more recycled art. Anyone looking for a nice home in Phoenix? Have I got a bargain for you.

Our family has decided to all paint rocks this year for Christmas presents, since we're trying to save for the aforementioned move. There are a lot of rocks in Arizona, so you can pick them up just about anywhere, and they're free, which is a big selling point, since even discarded library books cost money. It will certainly make for an interesting holiday.

Or not.

Return of the Library People

Library People return. It's been a long time since I did any of these. Not that they are all that difficult, but I got a little burned out on them. These are Library People #107-111, and they are, like all the others, drawn in graphite on the insides of discarded library books.

Ed Begley would be so proud.

Anyway, they are up for auction on eBay beginning tonight at 9:00 Pacific, so if you click on the picture you like, it will take you to that auction. I'm offering them in a block so you can save on postage if you buy more than one. They make unusual Christmas presents, perfect for the person who has everything.

Designing Skateboards for Zazzle

I started designing skateboards for Zazzle. I looked for a long time through the seven trillion designs they have there before I started. It's pretty incredible some of the designs they have. The long, thin design surface of a skateboard requires that you think creatively about your design composition, as some images just don't lend themselves readily to the skateboard layout. Realistically, I'm not a skateboarder. In fact, I've been bedridden for several weeks with a back injury, so jumping on my son's skateboard is pretty out of the question. But if I could, I'd probably want the one with the eyes. You can see my skateboards at my new Zazzle store, ottoblotto. Real original idea, huh?

Payloadz and the World of Instant Information

Internet marketing people are everywhere; you can't throw a rock on the web without hitting one. They've all written the definitive book, whitepaper, webinar, podcast, or whatever about how you, too, can make a bazillion dollars on the web, and for a mere $495.72, you can know their personal secrets. Yeah, whatever.
Some of them have written actually published books. I usually peruse them at my local Barnes and Noble for free, and if I find them interesting, I check them out of my local library, which is also free. You can learn a lot for less than $495.72.

One of the interesting things I learned about was a service called Payloadz. On Payloadz, you can upload your information product, be it how to compost with worms or how to make that aforementioned bazillion bucks, and make it instantly available to the entire world, day or night. You simply build a web page for your product, provide a link for them to pay through Paypal via Payloadz, and that's it. Payloadz handles the payment and download stuff. All you do is transfer the money from Paypal to your bank account and go merrily on your way.

It sounds too good to be true, and to some degree, it is. First you have to produce an information product, presumably on something about which you know a little bit. Secondly, you have to key into an audience that is actually interested in the information you've produced, be it worm composting or Internet marketing, which, when you think about it, are pretty much the same thing.

I wrote a study on Homophones for teachers and homeschoolers, which sells occasionally, although I think the actual number of people with a keen interest in English Homophones is likely pretty small.

If you have no real body of knowledge, and no inclination to produce an information product, it's not a problem. Lots of products on Payloadz have an affiliate option, so all you need to provide is enthusiasm and a web page with the appropriate links. Then just sit back and rake in the money. Or not.

There is still the issue of finding the significant number of people out there who are desperate for information on homophones or worm composting or Internet marketing, which is discussion for a different day.

Cafepress - Which Shop is Right for You?

I have 4 different shops on Cafepress. One shop is totally customized, two shops make use of the Cafepress templates, and one is a free, basic shop. Let's take a look.

My Basic Shop is Horriblescopes. It features a "My Life Sucks" design that goes along with the website it promotes, Horriblescopes.net. Horriblescopes is a free horoscope website I write that is of a decidedly spoof nature. The Basic Shop allows me to use any number of designs, but I can list each product only once. For example, if I list a Women's Plus Size Scoop Neck T-shirt with the "My Life Sucks" design on it, then I can't list another Women's Plus Size scoop Neck T-shirt in my Basic Shop. I can put a logo header at the top of the shop, but I can't use any kind of fun template to spruce up the shop any further. You can have as many free shops as you want. So, if you have 50 designs, you can have 50 different shops. It's a pain in the rear to keep up, though, and because your content won't be changing, it's not going to be the darling of any major search engine.

I have 2 Cafepress Premium Shops that use the Cafepress templates. The first shop is Biblical T Shirts. It features a series of t-shirts with scriptural quotes, many in multiple languages. For example, the scripture John 3:16 has designs in 16 different languages. Strangely, I have never sold an English version of this design, although I have sold it in other languages. Go figure. This shop uses a custom logo the same as the Horriblescopes shop, but because you can do so much more with the templates and customization, it looks much spiffier.

The second Premium Cafepress Shop I have is my ottoblotto shop. This was my first shop, and its focus has evolved over the years. It is about due for a facelift; I'll let you know when that happens. Anyway, it does not use a custom logo, and goes pretty straightforwardly off the template. You can see that it is possible to make a good shop using the template even if you have no HTML skills. But I think a more custom shop looks better.

My 4th Cafepress shop is the Happy Nest Site Shop. It is a shop that uses all custom stuff: custom background, colors, logo, etc. It is made to go along with another new site I am working on, The Happy Nest Site, which features bird articles, reviews, etc. It is just getting started, so there is a lot of building to do with it. Everything you read about making POD work for you says that having sites away from the POD site that offer other information and such will help drive sales your way. I guess I'll see.

So I hope this helps you if you are looking into POD sites as a way of making a few extra bucks. My advice still is that you not quit your day job just yet.

Cafepress vs Printfection vs Zazzle

Print On Demand Companies. Is this a great idea or not?

I have had a Cafepress shop for a few years. In those few years, I have managed to sell enough to actually cover my shop fees a few times, and once, last Christmas, I actually earned enough to receive a $28 check. So as a way to make a living, it hasn't exactly happened.

The Cafepress site says that they have shop owners who make 6 figure incomes from this stuff. I have tried to figure it out. I believe it is a numbers game. If you have 2 million products out there, you're bound to sell something, right? Another aspect of making Cafepress, or any of these sites work, is to write A LOT of keyword rich copy so the pages get indexed by the major search engines. This is the most boring part of it. Having to come up with all this copy can really stress one's imagination. Quite frankly, I hope no one reads all this stuff.

If you compare the three sites on Google Trends you will see that Cafepress is getting the most traffic, followed by Zazzle, and then Printfection. However, Printfection and Zazzle are showing increases in search volume while Cafepress is decreasing somewhat.

It seems to me that Cafepress has so many designs on it that it is hard to get seen just in their Marketplace. It's pretty much the same on Printfection and Zazzle. I somehow doubt many people search beyond the first 5 or 6 pages of designs, so your only options are to write obnoxiously keyword saturated copy for your designs so they will appear in natural search, or heavily promote your shops via blogs and outside websites.

I have had my shops on Printfection for a couple of weeks now, and opened a shop on Zazzle a couple of days ago. From examining my stats, I can conclude one of two things; either:

A. No one is going to these sites
or
B. My designs suck.

Of course, hardly anyone has visited my Cafepress sites either, despite the use of Google Adwords [a topic for another day]. So it might be option B.

I have 2 shops that have Biblical designs; Biblical T Shirts on Cafepress and Biblical T Shirts on Printfection. Half of my sales on Cafepress in the last 3 months came from the Biblical T Shirts shop there, and the other half came from the ottoblotto shop. The Printfection shops have had no sales.

My ottoblotto shop has a number of the items I have shown here on my blog, including numerous Library drawings.

I also have 2 shops that feature bird designs, Happy Nest Site on Cafepress and Birds of Paradise on Printfection. I have made only one sale on Cafepress from the site there, and nothing from Printfection. I am working on the creative copy stuff.

The good thing about Printfection and Zazzle is that their shops don't cost anything to have. You can upload a bazillion things there, and if nothing sells, you aren't out anything but your time. It only costs like $6 per month per premium shop on Cafepress, but you can only have 500 sections per shop. Of course, it will take you awhile to fill that up. Apparently, there are no limits with Printfection and Zazzle.

All these companies offer similar items for you to customize to your heart's content, and each offers a few unique items as well. Cafepress offers Print on Demand books, Printfection has glass cutting boards, and on Zazzle you can get skateboards and tennis shoes. All of which is time consuming. So maybe it will work out eventually, but I'm not holding my breath.

I have made an order from Cafepress. I can't say I was wowed by it. The printing was good, but the colors were not as vivid as they were on my monitor, specifically the aqua. I thought the printing on black was pretty good, though. I haven't tried Printfection or Zazzle yet. When I sell something and have some cash built up, I'll probably give them a try, too.

Maybe I'll be there next year...

See Cafepress vs Printfection vs Zazzle Part 2

Soul of the House - Clutter

I did some miniature art quilts some time back. This one was called "Soul of the House." It seems peaceful. Uncluttered. A fantasy. I think about houses having history, much like the history that I find appealing in my drawings on discarded library books. It is, on some level, the remaining remnants of the romantic in me that find some strange sense of connectedness through all this. My current house, while being a very nice house, is somehow not a home. I like it. It's very servicable, but it tends to attract clutter from out of nowhere. [At this point, my mother is pointing out to me in her mind that EVERY home I have attracts clutter.] This house, however, is somehow worse, being the lack of closet space or just the accumulation of stuff over time. Or perhaps the junk mail is breeding while we sleep. That's certainly possible. I am trying to get this house ready to put on the market, so I do, in a sense, create clutter even as I try to remove it. The endless sorting through one's stuff leads to such melancholy thoughts, I suppose. I'm sure it is folly to put a house on the market just now when NOTHING is moving in the Phoenix market, but the longing for green landscapes and a general inability to grasp the culture here has made us all ready to run back to the east coast without ever looking back. And run we will. Someday.

A Man May Know

What I find most difficult with my life currently is that there are just 24 hours to a day, and I usually have enough work on hand to fill about 36. I get a lot done, but I still fall short of the goals I have set.

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I did a few pieces recently, which I sold directly to the Canadians, and therefore didn't auction. This is one called "A Man May Know." Sounds important, doesn't it? [I love art that sounds important, don't you?] I actually glued a bunch of stuff over the rest of the quote without bothering to analyze exactly what it is that a man may know.

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Yes, apathy is a dreadful thing.

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I am not usually all that apathetic. I think some of it has to do with the forthcoming of menopause. Or is it mentalpause? I get confused. All I know is that it is hard to get really excited about anything when the temperature outside is hovering at about 108, and you are having a hot flash, which is a pretty fair assessment of my life just now. I should have packaged myself with my artwork and mailed myself to Canada.

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And as for men knowing, I imagine that it is just as well that the rest of the quote is covered. We all need a little mystery in our lives.

Illustration Friday: Hoards

I did a lot of these library book drawings; more than a hundred of them. They all sold, but I eventually burned out on doing them, and with the economy tanking, I took a second job and laid "art," such as it is, aside in favor of keeping on top of the bills. I have not done any art for a few months. Besides, who could afford to buy this stuff anyway?

But I got this call Wednesday evening from a man who had bought many pieces from me over the last year. He had opened a shop somewhere up in Canada where a lot of cruise ships come in, and he had some of those pieces in the shop.

His shop sells just recycled art stuff; nothing new. He was so excited to tell me how a man had come in and fallen in love with this piece and bought it for his mother who was a librarian at the Detroit Public Library for twenty-some years.

It reminded me that sometimes you do something that makes someone happy. How great is that? There have never actually been "hoards" of buyers for my work. It is just drawings of dead people on trash. But making someone happy is renewing.

He wants some more work, so I guess I'd better get on the go and do some stuff.

Ilustration Friday: Wide

I've been a little busy. I have been tutoring students after school in an underperforming school in the Phoenix area. It is occasionally rewarding, despite the volumes of paperwork required by No Child Left Behind. It's nice to get a little money back from the government, especially since my own kids have never made use of the public school system. I could make a long and wide blog post on this subject, but I won't bore you with that.

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I've also had some other projects going. You can take a look at Horriblescopes.net. It's horoscopes with a twist, and like the economy, the news is all bad.

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The drawing is titled Go Long, and is lithocoal and watercolor.

Pinewood Derby

Tomorrow is my son's Pinewood Derby race for Cub Scouts. It is a long, tedious affair that is well suited to the male mindset. Consisting of mostly guys hanging around, racing these little wooden cars down an inclined track with the help of only gravity, it is only mildly more exciting than watching paint dry.

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Towards the end of this day-long ordeal are the open class races in which anyone can race. My husband and daughter always enter these races while I sit quietly in a corner knitting or otherwise nodding off. The weigh-in for this event is tonight, which includes meticulously weighing and measuring each car and putting them in a vault somewhere so you can't alter them in the hours before the race. Whatever. This is way too serious for me.

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My husband, who works about 400 miles away all week, didn't get his car done, so it was just a big block of wood and four tires. He asked if I could help him out, so I transformed it into a sleek and stylish racer. OK, maybe not sleek. I emerged from the shop and called my children to come and look at my creation. They eyed it with great consternation. Right now they are calling the local mental health line for advice.

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They have suggested to me that I may be a little depressed. This is possible. In the meantime, I will look forward to tomorrow's Pinewood Derby with the anticipation I usually reserve only for things like root canals and visits from my inlaws. Please wake me when they announce the winner.

Illustration Friday: Multiple

I have been playing around with Photoshop this week. It's been fun for me, since it requires only the computer and no paints, pencils, or other supplies.

I took a job tutoring part time in a public school in Phoenix. It is an interesting job. All my kids are really sweet, and very motivated. My kindergarten class yesterday chose to continue doing math rather than have a story read to them. So either I am a fantastic math teacher or a lousy storyteller, take your pick.

The unfortunate subjects of my recent diversion into Photoshop have had the great embarassment of having their mugshots displayed on the web for all to see. It is a common practice here in Arizona to do that with drunk drivers. I don't know if that deters them any, although being the subject of my art might. Anyway, if you are interested in multiple prints of one of these for your guest bathroom, let me know. I may put them on cafepress if I think anyone cares.

Yeah, who am I kidding...

Illustration Friday: Blanket

The Super Bowl is happening right now. I am one of only 3 people in the United States not watching it. The other two are in comas. The Super Bowl is taking place only a few miles from my house. I took that as a good sign to not leave my house today. I can only imagine what traffic must be like around the stadium, and afterwards, the sheer volume of drunks on the road would seem to make all forms of travel unadvisable.

I played around with an old drawing and some pages from a Heloise book and my photocopier. It stands in my living room.

Why? Where do you keep yours?

I haven't done any work for Illustration Friday recently, as I have been sewing. My children think I need to update my look. I know they are right. I have become aware that I look OK in purple, which is a sure sign I am getting old. I think I will buy a red hat.

Buy it now on eBay http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&rd=1&item=370019927543&ssPageName=STRK:MESE:IT&ih=024

Illustration Friday: Stitch

I was working on an idea I saw in a recent issue of Altered Couture. They used old t-shirts to make new ones. Kind of like a serial murderer crossed with a 70 year old seamstress. I decided to stitch up one of my own from the abundance of free movie t-shirts collecting dust in the house. It is my favorite passage from Proverbs. I think I'll wear it to church. It suits me.

See some of my other stitched amusements @ http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=30971

Knitwits

Knitwits. That's what I call my kids. Both enjoy knitting and crochet. They make clothes for all the stuffed animals in the house, because it is important to not have naked animals hanging about, right?

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I am recycling some scraps of fabric and yarn. For purchase on etsy; just click the pictures.

Fiber Arts

I needed a little diversion from my usual artwork, so I decided to do some sewing and knitting.

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I admit it. I'm a fabric junkie.

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Most people who sew tend to accumulate a few scraps and things. Not me. 35 years of sewing, not to mention that costume design degree, left me a backlog of fabric of near epic proportions. I decided to loose a few pounds, and support the local quilting ministry in the process. So I went through my considerable stash, unloading over 100 pounds of superfluous fabric, leaving me with a mere 200 extra pounds hanging about the house. Time to recycle. Al Gore would be so proud.

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I did some sewing and knitting for Christmas. You can find things like this slightly irreverent combination of vintage Japanese silk and camouflage material in my etsy store. Please pop by and take a look.

http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=30971

Illustration Friday: Horizon

This week's Illustration Friday word is Horizon. I had a lot of work to choose from, but I ended up using this. It's a digitally altered picture printed on some heavily textured paper and collaged onto the cover of a discarded book. It says... I wish I could get out of this dead end job.

My husband and I went out on a date the other night for my birthday. Without kids. That wouldn't seem too significant except for the fact that we had not been out together without the kids since we moved to Arizona. That would be September of 2006, if memory serves.

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That sounds pathetic, I know.

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I used to wish I could see over the horizon, but recently I have decided that today's troubles are indeed enough for today.

http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=30971

Illustration Friday: Superstition

I'm not particularly superstitious. I step on cracks willy-nilly, I spill salt without tossing it over my shoulder, and I pay no attention to cats of any color.

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My mother used to have some sort of thing that you needed to exit the house by the same door you entered, or vice versa. I don't remember. My grandmother thought the weather had been messed up by the astronauts going to the moon. She also thought that if it rained while the sun was shining, then it would rain again tomorrow. She obviously didn't live in Arizona.

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This is a drawing I did on a book from the American Lending Library. It has no real relation to superstition unless you are a librarian, in which case you may believe that people who draw in library books go to hell.

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Or at least deserve to.

Tag, I'm IT.

I've been tagged. No one has ever tagged me before, so I must think heavily about this. First, here are THE RULES

1. Link to your tagger and post these rules on your blog.

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2. Share 5 facts about yourself on your blog, some random, some weird.

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3. Tag 5 people at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blogs.

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4. Let them know they are tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

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My five random facts:

1. I worked for Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood at one time. He was an incredibly real man.

2. I am planning my entire Thanksgiving dinner to be cooked and served on sticks: seafood kabobs, meat kabobs, skewered grilled veggies, bread sticks [they are their own sticks] and caramel apples, on a stick of course.

3. I am a biological mother, an adoptive mother, and a stepmother.

4. I have an IRA. [that would shock the heck out of my family]

5. I invited the Pope to my high school graduation, although I am not Catholic. He did not attend, but did send me a nice picture of himself and a copy of a mass for young people.

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Studio Lolo, Forever Young, and I can't think of anyone else to tag that wouldn't be irritated.

The piece at the top is a linoleum cut/collage/stencil.

Illustration Friday: Scale

Fun with Photoshop today.

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Unlike most Americans these days, my son is just a skinny thing. He likes to tell me he is macho, and loves to show off his muscles, such as they are. He weighs but 62 pounds soaking wet.

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When I was young, people who were overweight had the decency to wear something large and tent-like, but as more and more Americans creep into fatdom, those old inhibitions seem to have faded away. Here in Arizona, where it is always hot, there seems to be no end to the overexposure of flesh.

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We witnessed such an extreme example of this one day recently, that my son turned to me and said, "Mom, that's just WRONG!"

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Indeed. Where did those old inhibitions go?

Illustration Friday: Hats

I love drawing old men in hats, even though I hate driving behind them. They are never in a hurry to get anywhere. I drew this guy on the inside of a discarded book that had a map of the eastern US printed on it.

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I miss a number of things about the east coast, not the least of which is an obligation to be somewhat punctual. Perhaps it is just me. I am early or on time for virtually everything. Not so everyone here. Arriving a half hour late for any event is the norm. I can't understand it, but I have a theory as to why this occurs.

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Arizona does not spring forward or fall back. Arizona time is the same all year around. As a result, I suspect no one is really sure what time it should be so they just split the difference. It is a lame excuse, but it is the best I can come up with.

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I am so not getting this laid-back western way of life.

103

I usually find younger people to be less interesting to draw, although with the advent of so much cosmetic surgery and botox, older people may not be so much fun either. This girl, however, was intriguing to me with her upturned nose and deep set eyes. She was perfect for a book discarded from the North Arkansas Regional Library.

I miss the south. There is a beauty to the desert, but it doesn't speak to my soul. I hope I won't be wandering around in it for 40 years like a child of Moses.

One of the good things about Arizona is that there is little opportunity for fires such as the ones I unexpectedly visited over the weekend in California. Here, there is nothing to burn but rocks.

I suppose every place has its problems.

101 and 102

More Library People. I enjoy doing these, although I am not certain why exactly. These two are from a new group of books I got recently. I was particularly pleased to get this one from the Public Library of Detroit, Michigan.

I am off to Los Angeles to visit some of my husband's relatives for the weekend. I have the car so completely packed with children's stuff and bird cages that I am unsure if we will be able to move at all. I always think we will pack lighter next time, but it never really happens.

You can click on the pictures above to go to the auctions for these pieces. Thanks so much for dropping by.

Illustration Friday: Extremes

I suppose this week's topic is very appropriate in light of these two pieces I finished last night. They are extremely different from what I usually do. I had a couple of linoleum block prints sitting around that needed to be spiffed up a bit, and it went downhill from there.

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The picture of Mona uses a discarded library book cover, leather finished mat board, decorative papers, beads, table knives, vintage metallic wallpaper, and the aforementioned linoleum block print.

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The Blingless piece uses a pair of discarded library book covers, leather finished mat board, nuts and bolts, linoleum block print, large wooden letter blocks, and beads.

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I have a commentary on the adhesives used in the pieces on my art supply blog. The blingless one will go up for auction on eBay tonight, and the one of dear Mona will go up for auction on eBay Sunday night as part of the art squared theme week on redoing the old masters. Just follow the eBay link in the sidebar to reach either one as they come available.

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Thanks for visiting, and y'all come back now, y'hear?

And 100

Yes, it's Library People #100. It's a milestone for me, and somehow an accomplishment at a time in my life where every day is somehow the same, even though it isn't.

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My husband is home for the weekend, and he brought a terrible cold with him. I feel like the whole house is a biohazard. I am spending the weekend sleeping on the couch and otherwise avoiding being in the same airspace with him. I so hope I and the kids don't catch it.

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I just got a shipment o discarded library books, thanks to the fabulous efforts of my friend Zack. [Thanks Zack] I plan to get on to more Library People this week, assuming I don't catch this crud.

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I think I'll go have some orange juice.

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PS - you can purchase him on eBay right now. Follow the eBay link, and feel free to bid early and often.

99

Well, here we are at the precipice of a personal milestone. This is my 99th Library People drawing. I should have #100 done sometime this week, but I think there is something special about the 99th one, too. It's a little like a race wherein the finish line has come into view.

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Not that I'm finished with the series. I may never be finished as long as I am able to find the old books I need to draw in, and I suspect there will be old books for some time to come.

What will be the future of books, though? How long will it be that we use paper and shelves to house information? Wouldn't it be much easier if everything was housed on a tiny little drive that could fit in your pocket? Think of the space I could clear in my house for other, more useful things like......... OK, maybe not.

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Incidentally, the book was previously stamped as being from Bertrand Smith's Acres of Books in Long Beach, CA.

Illustration Friday: Open ...[and shut]

Intriguing, this week's Illustration Friday. It's been a very long time since I entered a show, so I hope you'll save a vote for me. I am actually going to enter this one. Scary.

I used to enter art shows all the time. They are an exciting, albeit expensive hobby. First, the artist pays to have the artwork reproduced on a slide [do they still do that? what a pain that is] then the artist pays a hefty sum to have the slide considered, then the artist must pay to ship the artwork if it is accepted, and then the artist must pay to have the artwork return shipped if it doesn't sell, and if it does, then the artist must pay another 50% to the sponsoring gallery, and wait 6 months through numerous whiney phone calls to get paid. I know how galleries can stay in business.

The last gallery I showed in was erl originals in Winston-Salem, NC. Despite whatever signed agreement they had, you were easily 6 months getting paid. No one ever told you when something sold. Finally, in frustration, I called them to say I would be coming in the morning to pick up my work and a check for whatever had sold. It was a 5 hour drive. An assistant had it waiting for me at the door, and the gallery owners wouldn't even come out to see me. They went belly up a few months later, owing hundreds of artists hundreds of thousands of dollars. I was lucky.

So, for me to enter an art show is a big deal. If I don't get in, that will be OK. I did this linoleum cut from an image of a man with a black eye that I had also drawn recently. One eye open, one eye shut; a good metaphor for life. If it gets into the show, you can see it and purchase a cheap original print, 6" x 6". It will also be listed in my eBay store if you live nowhere near the show in question, or should it not make its way into the show, just click the picture or title above. Or you can purchase one directly through me, sending me $10 to nschorr2@cox.net through Paypal for US , $11 for Canada, and $12 anywhere else. Be sure you have a correct mailing address. And thanks. I need the money.

Illustration Friday: The Blues

I don't usually stray too far from graphite, but this time I did. I suppose "the blues" is a good description of my life just now.

The Effects of Garlic on the Perimenopausal Woman

I go to a little coffee shop on Saturday evenings before church. There I can actually chat with my husband without constant interruption from the kids, and occasionally, that's pretty cool. I notice these women about my age, and every week they are there ordering the same thing - garlic bread.

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What's with that?

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I crave garlic all the time. I put powdered garlic on just about everything on my plate. My husband and children think I am psychotic. And smelly. They are probably not far from right, although I am still stable enough to remember not to put it in my coffee.

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An old dictionary gave its life for this drawing. I feel kind of sad for it, because the person who put the Ex Libris sticker in it never bothered to fill in a name. Hopefully the dictionary is uplifted by having this drawing inside its cover, even if the guy looks a bit psychotic. Kind of like me, only with less hair.

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Maybe he needs some garlic on his toast. You can purchase the real piece by following one of the eBay links, such as the one in the title. He's also in my Cafepress shop.

Blood Oranges

I think I've posted this drawing before, but I can't remember, and I am disinclined to sort through months of posts to find it. It has been a week since Otto passed, and I would like to say the grief is more managable, but I don't really think I've progressed significantly, so I am posting old work.

Because the economy is so lousy, I have started selling off some of my old kimono collection on eBay. There is little emotion attached to it, so that makes it easier to handle. It's really just stuff.

This piece reminds me of a teacher or two I had growing up. Grumpy, and haloed by a slice of blood orange. I suspect sainthood was a whole different thing for her. It's graphite and colored pencil. It is titled Dirge. I don't know the place in me from which it came, but it is close by.

In Memoriam

This is my dear Otto, as he was 17 years ago when I got him. He passed away over the weekend. I cannot possibly express how much it hurts.

Abstract Eyes

I did some more abstracts. I enjoyed doing them. This is one of them. It's not what I usually do, but I am doing more of this sort of thing. I'm not sure if it is the result of maturity or menopause. My son's birthday is in a few days. He will be 9. His great aunt bought him the giant Harry Potter Lego set from hell. It has castles and characters and all kinds of stuff. We bought him the Mars Mission Lego set, and he also has one on its way from Grandma, so we will soon begin constructing outbuildings of legos. Our planning skills obviously need some fine tuning.

Illustration Friday: Momentum

Momentum. I am trying to regain some momentum. Sales have been pretty slow, but I think that's got a lot to do with the national economy going down the drain. That spiraling downward momentum seems to be building, and recovery seems in doubt until after all the stuff with the sub-prime mortgages is flushed away. Just what I needed.

I decided to work on an abstract piece, taking a departure from the usual figurative work, although there are still eyes in it, so all is not lost. If you'd really love to have it on a tshirt or a greeting card or something like that, then visit my Cafepress store, and if you'd like to see the original, visit my listing on eBay.

Thanks for enduring that shameless moment of self promotion. What can I say? The kids need new shoes...

The Life of a Domestic Goddess

Today. Cook, clean, laundry, stand in front of grocery store for 2 hours selling Scout-a-Rama tix, decorate birthday cake, bake cinnamon buns, make lunch, eat dinner out, attend church service, prepare Sunday School lesson for tomorrow on Job, sing happy birthday and take pictures of son opening gifts, feed dog, two birds, and one tortoise.

Swim.

Would like a nap, but that seems unlikely.

Goddess accoutrements at Cafepress.